Couple credit 75-year marriage to important values of family and faith
Jim and Mary Jo Roberts, seated at center, pose with their grandchildren and great-grandchildren for a 2021 family Christmas party in the parish hall of St. Roch Parish in Indianapolis. (Submitted photo)
By Natalie Hoefer
Jim and Mary Jo Roberts sat in a cozy, sunny room in their Indianapolis home, four of their five children seated around them. An image of the Holy Family hung on the wall.
In that moment, the room was a snapshot of what has defined the Roberts’ 75 years of marriage: faith and family.
The gathering occurred a week before Jim and Mary Jo, members to St. Roch Parish in Indianapolis, celebrated their diamond anniversary on June 21.
Mary Jo marveled at the milestone.
“I never thought I’d live this long,” she admitted. “All of a sudden you’re here, and you don’t know what happened.”
That afternoon, stories and memories were shared. There were many laughs and a few tears as the family reminisced on the Roberts’ 75-year journey.
The foundation for that journey’s success originated years prior, rooted in similar upbringings of faith, family and values.
‘Faith is so important’
Mary Jo, 95, and Jim, 96, were both raised in Indianapolis by devout Catholic families with nine children—her family at the former St. Catherine of Siena Parish and his at St. Anthony Parish.
Both spoke with pride of the importance their families placed on their Catholic faith.
“My faith is so important to me,” said Mary Jo, her eyes tearing up. “That’s the way I was raised. I love my faith.”
She met Jim at the Indiana Roof Ballroom in Indianapolis in 1946 after Jim served with the Army in World War II.
“We both loved to dance, and he was a good dancer,” she recalled.
“She was a beautiful girl,” Jim added.
Their shared faith, values, hobbies and love for family led to a love for each other. After nine months of dating, the couple married on June 21, 1947.
They raised their four daughters and one son in St. Catherine of Siena Parish until 1963, then in St. Roch, the couple’s faith home to this day.
While Jim worked a successful career as a salesman, primarily of industrial kitchen equipment, Mary Jo was busy raising their children.
“She had her hands full,” Jim admitted. He recalled how, at Mass, the children “looked like a bunch of little ducks following Mary Jo down the aisle.”
Faith was at the center of the family, starting with Sunday Mass, their daughters recalled—whether they went with their “early riser” dad or with their mom “who liked to sleep in later.”
“Dad still calls and asks what Mass we went to” on the weekend, said their daughter, Nancy Storey, her sisters nodding in agreement.
They recalled being raised with faith as a part of everyday family life.
Their parents “gave us structure through the Catholic faith,” Storey said. “One of the key things in our family was we would all sit down for supper together and pray. We prayed the rosary, and we’d kneel and say our prayers at our bedside.”
“Dad always said our bedtime prayers with us,” her sister, Joni Carroll, added. “He always made them age-appropriate.”
A CYO tradition
The couple lived their faith in their parish and the community as well. Mary Jo was a member of
St. Catherine’s Altar Society and the Catholic Women’s League and volunteered at the former Home of the Good Shepherd for teenage girls in Indianapolis. Jim was a charter member of the Knights of Columbus Msgr. M. Downey Council #3660 on the city’s south side.
There was another side of the faith the Roberts contributed to “actively” in the most literal sense of the word: Catholic Youth Organization (CYO) sports.
The tradition began when Mary Jo was in grade school. She played in the archdiocese’s first CYO kickball league, recalling there were just five teams at the time.
Years later, the couple’s children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren would play CYO sports.
“We were all in CYO sports, and Mom never missed a game,” said their daughter, Rosemarie Stahley.
Her sister, Becky Adolay, nodded.
“If it wasn’t for CYO, I don’t know what we would have done,” said Adolay. She and her four siblings as well as some grandchildren went on to serve as CYO coaches and parish school athletic directors.
“CYO was part of our formation. We’d play CYO sports, we’d go to CYO socials—all with the support of Mom and Dad.”
Meanwhile, “Mom and Dad” stayed active themselves. The couple enjoyed playing golf and bowling, both as a couple and with their many friends—“especially after the children were grown,” Mary Jo added.
‘Good times and bad times’
As their children grew, so did their family—the Roberts now have 17 grandchildren and 54 great-grandchildren.
“When the Bible said, ‘Go forth and multiply,’ we said, ‘OK!’ ” Jim joked.
Their own upbringing in large families impressed upon Jim and Mary Jo the importance of being there for family when help is needed.
“We didn’t have a whole lot extra growing up,” Storey recalled. “But when Mom and Dad’s siblings needed help, they’d help. I always admired them for that.”
Stahley recalled a time when a young man on her husband’s side of the family was struggling.
“I had kids in school, life was busy,” she said. “I didn’t know if I could help. But Dad said, ‘You don’t have a choice. Think what Christ would want you to do.’ And that’s what they always did.”
“There are good times and bad times” in any marriage and family, Mary Jo noted. She teared up recalling the years their son Mark fought in the Vietnam War, and the prayers the family offered every night for his safety—prayers that were thankfully answered.
Recently, the Roberts and their children faced one of their greatest challenges—moving Jim into a nursing home in Greensburg.
“The transition has been heartbreaking and complicated at times,” the five siblings said in unified comments e-mailed recently to The Criterion.
But, they noted, because their parents “raised us to be a close family, grounded in faith, we have been able to lean on each other, as well as the Lord,” visiting their dad individually or with Mary Jo several times a week.
‘Family, family, family and faith’
Returning to that sunny, June afternoon as the
Roberts reminisced with their daughters, the conversation turned to what kept the couple’s marriage strong for three-quarters of a century.
“It helps to have the same values,” Mary Jo said. “Our most important values are family and faith.”
“Family, family, family and faith,” Jim chimed in. “That’s been the crux of everything we do.”
“And always be forgiving,” Mary Jo advised, with Jim adding to “be faithful and truthful.”
Stahley recalled advice her dad offered before her wedding that gives insight on her parents’ successful marriage: “Go to Mass together and pray together to have a long, happy life.”
The Roberts’ five children have followed their parents’ example. Their wedding anniversaries range from 34-55 years. Including Jim and Mary Jo, that makes for an incredible 302 years, a testament to valuing commitment and the sacrament of marriage.
Reflecting on her parents’ long-lasting love and the effect it’s had on their family, Adolay came to a conclusion.
“The best gift a man can give his family is to love his wife, and you can reverse that,” she said. “That [love] and their faith are the best gifts they gave us, and that’s why they lasted 75 years.” †
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