Speakers offer hope for those struggling with mental illness

Tom and Fran Smith of St. Nicholas Parish in O’Fallon, Ill., have dedicated their retirement years to teaching people the facts about mental illness and suicide. With their son, Kevin, they founded the Karla Smith Foundation. It is named for their 26-year-old daughter, who died by suicide as a result of her bipolar disorder. (Photo by Mary Ann Wyand)

By Mary Ann Wyand

First of two parts

Greenwood—An estimated 50 million Americans are affected by mental illness, according to National Institute of Mental Health statistics. Less than 20 percent of those people seek treatment.

One in five American families is affected by mental illness at least once, research indicates, and mental disorders are the leading cause of disability in the U.S. and Canada for people aged 15 to 44.

Five years ago, Tom and Fran Smith, along with their son, Kevin, of St. Nicholas Parish in O’Fallon, Ill., founded the Karla Smith Foundation to provide “hope for a balanced life” for people and families that are struggling to cope with mental illness. (Related: Nine strategies help person and family cope with mental illness)

After their 26-year-old daughter died by suicide in 2003 as a result of her bipolar disorder, they discovered that ministering to others with educational programs also helped them grieve and begin to heal from the pain and guilt which devastated them as parents. (Related: Speakers: Education is key for families dealing with suicide)

They were the keynote speakers for a Feb. 3 program about “Breaking the Silence of Mental Illness in Parishes and Religious Congregations” held at SS. Francis and Clare Parish in Greenwood.

On Feb. 4, they discussed “Suicide Grief: A Day for Persons Caring for Family Members and Loved Ones Challenged by Mental Illness and the Experience of Suicide” during the seventh annual archdiocesan Office of Family Ministries and Catholic Cemeteries Association Mission Day at Our Lady of Fatima Retreat House in Indianapolis.

Tom Smith is the author of two books titled A Balanced Life: Nine Strategies for Coping with the Mental Health Problems of a Loved One and The Tattered Tapestry: A Family’s Search for Peace with Bipolar Disorder.

“Our daughter, Karla, was 26, beautiful, charming and brilliant in many ways,” he said on Feb. 3, “and she was dead.”

With Karla’s twin brother, Kevin, they established a foundation in her memory to educate people about the facts, symptoms, myths, statistics, warning signs, spirituality and stigmas associated with mental illness and suicide.

“I think in some ways, as a parent, you feel like you are going to die right along with your child,” Fran Smith said. “And yet, I think once we worked through some of our guilt and grief we became much more educated regarding mental illness, and felt that we wanted to do something positive in her memory.

“We wanted to provide hope, as our mission statement says, for a balanced life for anyone who lives with someone who has a mental illness,” she said, “and also for anyone who may have lost someone to suicide.”

When a loved one struggles with a mental illness, she said, “it is very difficult to keep your life in balance.”

They define mental illness as “medical conditions that disrupt the person’s thinking, feelings, mood or ability to relate to others in daily functioning.”

Mental health problems diminish a person’s ability to cope with the ordinary demands in daily life, Tom Smith said. “One of the major difficulties with mental illness in contrast with physical illness is that … it’s often difficult to diagnose a person’s mental illness and determine appropriate treatment. Many people with a mental illness appear normal. You may not notice any kind of [unusual] behavior, but the behavior related to the mental illness is there.”

Fran Smith said Karla’s bipolar illness and death taught her not to be judgmental.

“We just don’t know another person’s story,” she said. “We don’t know why someone is the way he or she is. … If a family has a physical crisis, people tend to understand that. If people live with mental illness, I don’t think there is that same understanding.”

As a society, Tom Smith said, “we have always underestimated the number of people with mental illness so our mental health care systems for centuries have been inadequate, and it’s still true today.

“It is possible to support people with mental illness,” he said. “Their illness can be successfully managed with professional help, medication, and support from their family, friends, pastor and parish.”

The President’s Commission on Mental Illness addresses the widespread problem of stigma, Fran Smith said, the negative attitudes and beliefs that make people fear, reject, avoid and discriminate against people with mental illness.

“Stigma leads others to avoid living, socializing or working with, renting to or employing people with mental disorders, especially severe disorders, such as

schizophrenia,” she said. “It leads to low self-esteem, isolation and hopelessness [for people struggling with mental illness].

“Responding to stigma, people with mental health problems internalize public attitudes and become so embarrassed or ashamed that they often conceal their symptoms and fail to seek the treatment they need,” she said. “This is very sad. … Until we bring this more out into the open, … we won’t be addressing the problem.”

People with mental illness can live a normal life with proper treatment and medication, Tom Smith emphasized. “There is much more hope now.”

(Next week: Suicide.) †